This post might be a bit different from my previous posts, It was never different before but since now this blog has been turned into an educational and informative blog, so I deleted most of my old posts- some lyrics, videos, journals etc. That was before, so now, back to track.

This song, I regard is a very special song although the lyrics directly praise a girl who is somewhat special to the guy (of course you all know this song was from Bruno Mars, right?) You know what, we can change the lyric from this:

Oh her eyes, her eyes

Make the stars look like they're not shining

Her hair, her hair

Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful

And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know

When I compliment her

She wont believe me

And its so, its so

Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay

I say

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails

I could kiss them all day if she'd let me

Her laugh, her laugh

She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful

And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know

Id never ask you to change

If perfect is what you're searching for

Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking

If you look okay

You know I say

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

The way you are

The way you are

Girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

INTO THIS! -------->

Oh your eyes, your eyes
Make the stars feel like they're not shining
your hair, your hair
Falls perfectly without you trying

you're so wonderful
And I tell you every day

Yeah I know, I know
If I compliment you
you wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think you can't see what I see

But every time you asks me do you look okay
You know I'd say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause you are amazing
Just the way you are

your hand your hand
I could hold them all day if you'd let me
your laugh, your laugh

you hate but i think it's so lively

you're so wonderful
And I tell you every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
I'd never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause peeps you're amazing
Just the way you are

And thus, this sounds more accepting for BOYS (a bit less accepting, i think) and GIRLS, for all!

One thing you could learn from this song, you are amazing, all of you are amazing. Have self-confidence because everyone is pretty/handsome inside out. Just be YOU!

Causes of Domestic Violence

Domestic violence is an act that can occur due to many factors. These factors are the fundamental reasons as to why an individual would act violently and cause harm to people around them. These factors include environment, social influence, and emotions. In this research, we will dig deep into those factors and find out how they become a reason for a person to act violent and bring harm to the people around them.

Environment

Environmental factors are basically factors that are brought up by the surroundings or area of which a person lives in or inhabit. These factors play a big role in the change of behaviour or demeanour of an individual. Such factors would include the condition of a family institution, work place, and learning institution. Let’s take an example of a situation where environmental factors cause behavioural changes and causes tendency towards violent actions. A simple example that can be taken would be a person who’s exposed to a violent setting such as a violent family

. If the members of the family such as the parents practice violence in raising the children, eventually the children themselves will have the tendency to become violent and act aggressively. This happens because constant exposure towards violent acts causes a person’s mind to think that violence is something that is normal and acceptable. By instilling this into an individual’s mind, the individual will opt to act violent and choose to hurt others using force and aggressiveness. Another example that we can take especially in the context of Malaysia itself is the environment of boarding schools and military schools. The environment in these schools has bee

n proven to cause tendency towards violence and aggressiveness. This is because most of these schools practice violent and humiliating traditions. Due to this, the students in these schools become violent because they are already with the thinking that violence is something that is permissible by nature. As a result, dire consequences such as serious injuries and even fatality of the students become the headlines of newspapers and magazines. With all of that said, it is evident that the environment or condition of a setting is a major factor that can lead towards domestic violence because it affects the mindset of an individual causing the person to think that v

iolence is not wrong hence leading to violent and aggressive actions.

Social Influence

Social influence can be defined as the influence brought by people who are close to us and also society. It has been proven that peers can affect a person’s behaviour and actions. Domestic violence is not an exception of course. This is because an individual always conforms to the norms of a group that they want to be in. If the group practices violence as a part of their normal activity, an individual who wants to be accepted into that group must of course act the same way. An example of this would be gangster groups and gangs .These groups normally formed by males are notoriously known for beating up other people, threatening others and also fighting in public. Individuals who are involved in these gangs act violent in order to feel accepted and wanted

by the group. This is because they now have the mindset that to be a real friend they must follow whatever their peers are doing. They believe that it is the only way to be a part of the group and not get left out. When this thought is embedded in their heads it causes them to become violent and aggressive and harm others. Therefore, it is clear that social influence is a major contributor towards a person’s change in behaviour from a normal state to becoming violent because of the need to be accepted by friends and colleagues.

Emotion

Another factor that causes domestic violence is emotion. It is proven that a person’s emotion is co-related to his or her actions. In the aspect of domestic violence this is also a fact. Emotions such as anger, envy, hatred and tension always causes a person to act violent because when these emotions are present in an individual, they become emotionally unstable and their level of rationality deteriorates. When this occurs, a person’s judgement becomes poor resulting to violence as an imaginary solution to his or her issues. This is proven ti

me and time again by cases of fights and assault cases that appear on television and newspapers day in and day out. When investigation is carried out, it is often found out that the assault happened because of envy, hatred, and also tension. These people result to violence because they believe that it is the prime solution towards their issues or problems. Also, they act in such a way as a sign of protest towards whoever is causing them to feel all this negative emotions. They opt to retaliate with violence in order to get hold of the upper-hand of a particular situation believing that they have won the ‘war’ that they are in. So, it is prominent that domestic violence also occurs due to unstable emotions. Negative emotions such as anger, hatred, envy, and tension decreas

es one’s level of rationality and this leads to poor judgement of what is right and what is wrong. All of this then causes a person to think that violence is the best way to handle issues and cope with the situation that they are in.

After that elaboration of factors that contribute to domestic violence it can be said that these factors are major causes of domestic violence. The environment that we reside upon affects our mindset about violence and when a person lives in an environment that is accustom to violence he or she will eventually become a violent person hence causing occurrence of domestic violence. Social influence also contributes to domestic viole

nce by affecting the mindset of people who want to be accepted in a group or community. Lastly, emotions also cause domestic violence to occur by blinding a person’s judgement and rationality. However, there are many methods that can be practiced to overcome these factors in order to curb domestic violence from happening.

be concerned netizen :)

Counseling and My Understanding

Since young i have been involving myself in various activities related to helping youths and students such as church camps or school activities. My involvement in this activities especially from the school part mostly because of my father. My father is a counselor at my school, SMK Bau and sometimes he directly or indirectly made me involved in school talks on drugs, moral declination among teenagers, school camp and many more. There are many thing that I learnt about counseling indirectly from my father and from the way the school function.

From what I understand, a person who is given the trust to listen to others’ problems and find a way of making the problems much easier for the clients to handle is a person of great responsibilities. It is normal for human being protective towards their problems and dilemmas and thus making it not easy to share them with other people. Therefore, when a client meets a counselor and asks for advices or opinions, that mean the client has trust and high expectation for the counselor. That trust and expectation received from the clients are what make the task somewhat difficult and burdening. A counselor needs to be prepared mentally and physically to face varieties of clients who have different needs and necessities.

Although I have never been to a counseling session or even conduct one, I believe that only during that session the client is able not just to express their problems or dilemma but also the time to comfort themselves. By seeking the help from a professional, the clients somewhat feel secure of spilling the problems out. Even though the counselor’s range of duties does not include giving the absolute solution of a problem, their discussions or dialogues during the session might help the client to come across other solutions. A counselor gives their opinions or samples of solutions or examples of ways to reduce the client’s crisis but does not force or influence the client to accept his/her idea.

One specialty in counseling that caught my intention is marriage and family counseling. For me, this field of counseling is important as it deals with the most common problems among the society. Most families face the common problems of parenting, communication, infidelity, loss of family members or substance abuse. Counselor in this field of specialty does not only assist by giving several ideas on how to manage the situation, but also may give tips on dos and don’ts to generate a healthy family. Marriage counseling is very important for every couple who wants to start a new life together. Counselor would give advices, preparatory for new challenges that would surely come in the future, importance of being understanding and tolerance towards each partner and so on. These tasks are what make the profession as a marriage and family counselor interesting because every happy and healthy family produces successful children and the children today are the leaders tomorrow.

To conclude, the subject of counseling itself is interesting but when it comes to practicality, it is not an easy thing to do. This is because every counselee or client has different needs of advice and different ways to be approached. The variety of behavior of human being is one of the big challenges that strike every counselor besides concerning the age of certain group of clients and also clients background. But nevertheless, counseling as complicated and as challenging it is, the main purpose is to help people and that is what matters.

my classroom observation

Last February, 2^nd 2011, my friends and I went to Sekolah Kebangsaan (Satu) & (Dua) Simpang Lima, Klang Selangor. The school is situated not far from the main road and is close to housing area and shops. With big grass field and trees everywhere and colourful building blocks and canteen, I am sure the atmosphere and the environment are comforting and cheering for the students. The teachers are friendly and the same goes with the students.

We arrived there about 9.30 in the morning in our formal clothes. There were five of us, and when we stepped out of the car, we were greeted by Puan Siti Anizah, the school counselor. We were brought around the school. Some of the students greeted us “good morning” and many others watched with suspicious looks on their face. We were immediately distributed among classes because it was near recess time. The school practices two recess times and it is nearly the first recess session so we rushed to the assigned classes.

I went to class 6 Erat, with Madam Kamales, their English teacher. Madam Kamales was a lovely lady. I immediately grabbed a chair and sat at the back of the class. Madam Kamales sat in her chair. The students all went to her and showed their past homework. The students went to her one by one and know their turn as it was a routine. After she was done checking the students’ work, she gave instruction so that the students settle down. Before she started she told the students to keep all their things away from their table except for their textbook and pencil case. ‘Are you ready?’ she asked and the students yelled excitedly, ‘Yes!’.

The students then were asked to read the passages in the book one by one. The paragraphs were about different types of school in Malaysia. Their word pronunciation is fluent and accurate except for few complicated words. After each passage reading, Madam Kamales asked them what the name of the school is in the previous passage and their opinion if they were to study there. Then Madam Kamales explained to them what are the functions and advantages of each school type. The students were then instructed to do the exercise in the textbook. Madam Kamales then drew a table on the whiteboard and asked the students to fill the table with the right answers. When the students gave the wrong answer, Madam asked repeatedly until one of them gave her the correct answer.

The class came to an end when the recess bell rang. Madam Kamales told the 6E’s students to read on the next topic in the textbook for the coming English class and reminded them sternly that she will asked them questions regarding the topic immediately when she enters the coming English class.

Then, I followed Madam Kamales to her next class, 6 Ikhlas. She brought along a can with her into the class. Before she started her lesson, Madam Kamales assembled the students for two minutes to clean the classroom and pick any rubbish on the floor and threw them in the dustbin. After completed the chore, the students went back to their seats but they were all scattered, so Madam Kamales told the students to move forward and seat nearer to the front.

‘Are you ready? I want no books on the table except for your English textbook. Bags and bottles on the floor’. The students obeyed and remove any ‘distraction being’ from the table. Madam Kamales then distributed exercise paper copies to be cut and pasted on the students’ books. She rewrote the instruction on the whiteboard.

Write 5 sentences about the picture. 1. A girl and a boy are _____ (verb+ing) 2. … Playground Sliding Woman Scooter Boy Seesaw Swing … Riding … Circle the activity that involves the instrument in the picture. Ex: Playground : *circle Seesaw

After the students were done doing the exercise given, Madam Kamales then gave another exercise but this time around, she asked them to answer it on their own.

When the other students were doing their work, I saw a few of them were whispering to each other, giggled and day dreaming. After the given time, 15 minutes later, Madam Kamales called the students to the front one by one. She corrected them on their spellings mistakes. Some students were quite slow in doing their work and they came to the front with their incomplete work. Madam Kamales canned few of them on the palms.

The bell rang, indicating the ending of the classroom session. The students were reminded to finish their homework. It was recess time for 6 Ikhlas. Before Madam Kamales exited the class, I asked her why she treated the two classes differently with different exercises though they are Sandard 6’s students. She then explained that the students are all streamed from the smart ones to the poor students. The earlier class, 6 Erat was the good class and 6 Ikhlas was the weakest class. That was why she used different ways and exercises for both classes.

She also explained that she needed to be more strict and stern when dealing with weaker class but at the same time, give proper guidance and help as they were not fast in catching up with studies as compare to students in better class. She used more drilling method when in weaker class and more topic discussions when she was in better class. But one thing she highlighted was, do not be extremely harsh and strict when dealing with weaker students because our aim is to give them guidance and better understanding in studies, not to scare them and make them shiver during class time.

My friends and I gathered at the school compound after we were done with our observations. We thanked Madam Kamales, Puan Siti Anizah, the other English teachers and also the headmaster of Sekolah Kebangsaan (Satu) & (Dua) Simpang Lima for giving us the opportunity and corporation to perform our school observations.

From what I have observed and watched during the English classes conducted by Madam Kamales, I can say she gave extrinsic motivation to her students, from both classes. She gave compliments to her students when they answer questions or exercises correctly. She canned her students when made mistakes, so the students fear her but they knew that they would only be punished when they did something wrong.

During Madam Kamales’ classes, I realized they were teacher-centered classrooms. Madam Kamales allowed the students to talk on the topic, spoke out their own opinions like how she did with the 6 Ikhlas class but still, she was in control of the discussion. She did not let the students strayed away from what they were supposed to learn.

Although the main material in English class is the textbook, Madam Kamales did not apply the usage of the book in her lessons. For example, the photocopied papers she distributed to the 6 Erat students, since she knew the students would not be able to catch up or digest the long paragraphs in the textbook, she used different lesson plan.

Social Gap between seniors and juniors in university

It is very assuring that everyone; the youth, working people, adults etc has experienced how schooling is like and so, we can jump to another assumption, everyone has experienced how university’s life feels like. It is a life full of havoc things, interesting peers, busy assignments, the epoch when we all have the chance to try things that raise our curiosity level up high like the Petronas Tower. Despite these hullaballoo, there are equally amount of depressing sensations in the young adults’ life. Studying in university is not much better than when we were still under our parents care. Also, it is not the same like when we were in clicks during our middle school. Social structure in university, any university and colleges in fact, serves different experience and practice in order for students to survive in the institutional structures. There are two major groups which we can obviously portray in the university’s institution; the juniors and the seniors. These two groups have always been intertwining with each other, without the seniors, there will be no juniors, and vice versa. Unfortunately, there has always been a gap between these two groups, which we can say comes from the factors of maturity level, in identical of notions and also seniority ego. These factors may affect the social structure in terms of less integrity in activities conducted and also weak organization structure.

One clear difference that we could evidently discover between the seniors and juniors is the age difference. While it has been shown that older persons are generally more mature, psychological maturity is not determined by one's age (Wikipedia, 2011). While people believe that juniors cannot make a mature decision compare to seniors, the university environment already marks labels to these groups of people. Others will always regard the seniors as the “wise ones” and the juniors as the “lambs” or the docile ones. Since seniors come to university earlier than the juniors, they are considered as more knowledgeable or familiar with the university’s protocols, rules and regulations. The juniors, still in the process of adapting themselves with the new university’s surrounding and environment frequently choose to stay silent and let the professionals lead.

Things eventually develop when the juniors progress and become the seniors; they sooner or later become familiar with the university’s life thus the life role as juniors and seniors in university continues in circle.

Since there is an age gap between seniors and juniors, of course they also have in identical notions. Even when we are among our own group, each and every one of us has our own opinion and thoughts, try to consider when we are in a larger institution. It is hard to communicate when others do not understand or do not have the same doctrine as we have. That is what happens between seniors and juniors in university.

In my observation, from what I saw in my own faculty, there is a large gap between the seniors and juniors mainly because they have different opinions on how to handle and organize activities and classes. The juniors are more manic and chatty while the seniors act professionally and very calm. I often heard talks like “The juniors are very noisy, they act like monkeys in the faculty. That is so inappropriate for them to act so” or “The seniors all look so gloomy and serious. They are no fun”. This discussions among one another actually bring the idea that the seniors and juniors are forming clicks, not considering they are from which batches, still bring conflicts and misconceptions not only among them but also the staff and lecturer.

Another factor affecting the gap between the seniors and juniors is the seniority ego that is experienced by some of the seniors in the same department. People who are fresh to seniority are often anxious with the title, and thus results to escalating ego. Some are fine with the title senior but others never get over it and they tend to show off their authority to juniors. Their ego may result from their desire to show and convey the new comer (juniors) that they should respect the seniors. Sometimes their ego goes to the extent of “keeping” their favourite lecturer, conducting activities that involve only the seniors’ click and rule/demand (bully, I can say) around the juniors to participate in their activity. For example, an activity conducted by the seniors requires compulsory participation from the juniors but not the seniors to attend. This bias treatment often makes consequence with dissatisfaction among the juniors.

We can guarantee that most people dislike being treated faultily just in order to give other people respect and reverence. So, most juniors keep a distance from the seniors to avoid any misunderstandings and conflicts

The social structure in the education institution might collapse if these two communities do not work together. Both seniors and juniors are depended on one another, whether t is done consciously or unconsciously. When these two groups do not work together, in terms of university’s life, the effects include less integrity in activities conducted and not to forget, a weak organization structure.

We need the students to participate when an activity is done. Whether the activity is done in the faculty level, the university level or international level, we need both parties to contribute; the seniors may lead because they have gained experiences in the previous activities while the juniors can learn from the seniors. Without one of these groups, an activity would not function or happen like what it is supposed to be.

It is typical for us, the university community to elect a leader that could lead us or as they say, “become our voice and to speak out our thoughts and opinions. All students; seniors and juniors are asked to vote their nominees, with the one who gets the most vote becomes the head of the students (MPP). Without the corporation among the students to vote or voice out their thoughts, the students’ organization structure becomes weak. To allow a weak organization to lead and care for the students is like living in a dilapidated house waiting for the time to collapse. Students’ community in university comprises both groups of students; seniors and juniors to work together, to make an affective and productive society.

Both parties relies on each other, thus support the functionalist theory, if one institution collapses, it will affect the others. It is important to keep both clusters at the same level, equalize the functions and make them work among each other, despite the gap. Gap between seniors and juniors is unavoidable but we can lessen the gap. One has to be sensitive when deals with two groups of totally different people, learn how to adjust with their situations to avoid misunderstandings. Act professionally in spite of different notions as that will practice us on how to deal a more variety of people when we deal with the world after our university’s life. There are still a lot more to learn, a lot more to practice and a lot more advices to apply in our own life and perspective to effectively with the world society.